Isabella* can chant in Mandarin and Cantonese and knows where outer Mongolia is…

Well, I’m so friggin happy for Isabella. No offense to any real Isabella’s in blogland.

Yikes, am so over smug moms. The only time I am remotely smug is when people complain about how sickly their kids are and I do say: Thank goodness my son is healthy. But he does get loads of vitamins and I’ve cultivated a healthy appetite for especially veggies, fruit and dairy – so I reckon with all the hard work I put into his health… I’m allowed to be smug with kind permission from Tania who advised me to always touch wood when I have an attack of the smugness ๐Ÿ™‚

My son can do a lot of things that I don’t proclaim and I sometimes wish I can tell Isabella’s mom that Thomas could do the things Super Isabella is now doing roughly six months ago but then that would make it seem like I’m in on the competition. So T and I just play with the toys and do our own little thing while Isabella does what Thomas has already forgotten how to do.

Honestly! My child not only knows where Outer Mongolia is… he can recite the longitude and lattitude! LOL.

Don’t get me started on the losing babyweight. Urgghhh, the whole “I had two ricecakes and a slice of cucumber and feel so fat and bloated now.” brigade is also so tiring. You might have your pre baby body back sort of kind of but I’m not the one who had to go back to hospital three times because I ripped my wound open trying to fit back into my skinny jeans on day 5 or who’s wound went almost fatally septic because she didn’t want to cover it up too much otherwise she couldn’t wear her hipster jeans… 

Silly bunt… and no guys, I really am not a bitter and jealous old fattie who has a dof son. Just think there’s so much to enjoy out there and do with our kiddies. And no the silly bunts in question won’t read my blog because they’re the original blondes who uses tipp-ex on their screens to fix mistakes! whahahahakakaka – sorry that bit was me being ugly!

*name has been changed to protect the innocent

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42 thoughts on “Isabella* can chant in Mandarin and Cantonese and knows where outer Mongolia is…

  1. rebeccav

    Bwahahahahaha! Well said Shell. And don’t forget the moms who “forget to eat”. Forget to eat? I think I may be the bitter old fattie with the dof son ๐Ÿ˜€

    Reply
  2. rochelle.barrish

    oooh don’t get me started on the forgot to eat thing… And no, you have two gorgeous sons and your husband loves your body! Who cares about the rest?

    Reply
  3. Parentpassions

    hehe this is brilliant. A “contact” on FB took a photo of their kid writing her own name and said – “Look how brilliant my daughter is”. Eugh, vomit, delete, defriend. It made me squirm it was so showy offy – sheesh. So with you on this one!

    Reply
  4. FoxieRox

    Hahaha. Love this post. I guess there is no getting away from these moms. I hope someone kicks me if I EVER do this.

    Reply
  5. deblet

    We had friends whose kid is like this…..She speaks Chinese,goes to Chinese school(they aren’t even remotely Chinese,but lived there for 2 years when she was a toddler)she plays the violin and piano and also composes her owns music….ughhhh,all my kids play is the fool and they speak sms Englisk…ja na wot i sayin…

    Reply
  6. Sumanda

    Hy, hy, hy, Rivan is die eerste een in sy klas wat al sy eie naam kan skryf Whoohooo!!!!!! :-DEk vermoed ek mag dalk as een van daai braggers wees ๐Ÿ˜€

    Reply
  7. Jwebber

    HA HA. I have a similar post typed up. Was going to publish but then I though that maybe I’m overreacting because I was a bit PMS at the weekend. I’m going to be seeing the smug parents again this weekend and this will determine if I press PUBLISH.xx

    Reply
  8. peasinpods

    Great post! I totally agree. My son is way slower than my daughter was with talking but he can CLIMB. And I am proud of him for that. ๐Ÿ™‚ Why do moms torture each other (and their poor babes) with the competition thing? I think we are constantly trying to “measure up”. To what though? NOBODY is perfect. xx

    Reply
  9. shazdart

    Oh this is so good!!! Why do people not realise what pressure they put on their kids with this kind of “BRAGGING”I was thankful if Jess opened her eyes each morning! xxxx

    Reply
  10. rochelle.barrish

    Nah, Minki, we’re not saying you can’t talk about your child’s achievements we’re just not into people who go into overdrive. Like violin lessons when they’re 6 months and golf and ballet lessons from age 1 – you know the utterly ridiculous things.

    Reply
  11. tania.roux

    Hey gal, you crack me up, have yourself a little 5 star rating! I’m also off to one of those parties with the ‘horses’ (thanks Deblet) this weekend. And they are all rich and smug.

    Reply
  12. ludditelass

    I used to take these bragging mums so seriously and worried endlessly about whether D was meeting his milestones and how far behind Isabella* he was – blah blah blah. Then the universe decided to send us Baby K who has developmental delays and I’ve finally learnt to chill and go with the flow and just laugh at the stressed-out competition mums. As for forgetting to eat. Might as well say you forget to breathe or sleep – as if!

    Reply
  13. rochelle.barrish

    Couldn’t agree with you more! Just chill and I’ve taken a leaf out of Shazzie’s book. I’m so grateful every morning just to get my morning kiss and cuddle and ‘nice mommy’. Meaning I’m a good Mommy!

    Reply
  14. cliche

    Smug moms get me down too. Like the time someone said to me: “I just chose to stay at home with my kids because I don’t want anyone else to raise them.” HUH????? Sigh.

    Reply
  15. chanua

    Funny. Love reading your stuff. One smug mom said to me,”Your daughter is soooooo small sjoe she prob won’t grow very tall when she a adult.” Her daughter then a head taller. Saw her a few weeks ago, my daughter now stands 1,5 tall and only 10. Her daughter a head and shoulder shorter. She looks my daughter up and down and smugly says prob takes after her dad. I politely smiled and said,”Probably” ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
  16. parent24ed

    You meet those moms again when their children get 80% for Maths and you want to shriek ‘Well mine got 90%,’ but you just won’t bother.

    Reply
  17. parent24ed

    I’m also very good at remembering to eat, that’s why my tummy lies down next to me in bed. Okay, confess, who out there is a forget-to-eater?

    Reply
  18. rochelle.barrish

    Yup, my tummy also does the obedient puppy lying next to me in bed. Would love to know if we have any forget-to-eaters.

    Reply

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