In the event of our death . . .

Before DH and I were both diagnosed with very rare, incurable (apart from organ transplants) andย life-threatening (if we don’t take meds and if the meds no longer works) conditions, we had a plan with what happens to Thomas if he is still a minor whenย we die.

After these conditions were diagnosed in us, we’ve had to revise this plan. Before the whole medical dramas we had people for “one day when we die”. Now that we know for sure we could drop dead at anytime, we’ve had to rethink this. On Saturday we revised our wills and made plans for a more immediate expiry date.

Amazing how your view of friends and family changes when you have to decide which one of them has to stand in for you as parent when you are no longer around.

Anyhoo, we’re happy with our choice. Decided on my step-mom and sister. I think the blend of young and old is perfect and they are both financial boffs so I know they won’t blow our money on bags, shoes and stuff and send our son to the local overcrowded state school! ๐Ÿ™‚

Now we have to approach them, get their deets and get the wills updated officially. Yiikes.

Scary, but necessary.

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12 thoughts on “In the event of our death . . .

  1. c.boshoff

    The sad truth is, any of us can die at anytime, and we seem to think we have all the time in the world. Stan and I have also been talking about who get’s the kids should something happen, but we never seem to get to the official part, most likely because deep down, we are scared of the posibility… Hugs

    Reply
  2. rochelle.barrish Post author

    So true, we were just as scared before. But nothing like being confronted with the very real possibility of dying to give you a kick up the bum re these sort of matters.

    Reply
  3. Coyote

    It is importunately one of the things many people leave incomplete.
    Great you getting your will sorted.

    Reply
  4. nusha

    This is something that is seriously lacking in our house … we have wills but no mention of who would stand in as parents for our kids … mostly because we can’t decide … hubby is an only child and there’s no way I would leave my kids with my brother!
    My best friend is an option but hubby is not happy with that choice either … so we are very short of worthy candidates!! ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

    Reply
  5. helen_77

    DH & I were talking about this just this weekend. We decided that his younger sister would be ideal to take of Liam. They have good heads on their shoulders and both adore Liam. Their daughter calls Liam her brother and they have such a great relationship.
    Do you actually have to specify this in your will? DH is busy updating our stuff. I personally don’t have a will, my view is, because I don’t own anything anyway.
    I didn’t realise that both you & your hubby were ill. I remember you have a heart problem, not so??? Pardon if I’m incorrect.

    Reply
  6. rochelle.barrish Post author

    You don’t have to specify but it just clears up any confusion and stuff. What if you told Sis you want her to take Liam but DH’s parents feel because he is their grandchild, they have more right to him? We feel it’s better to make it clear from the get go. We don’t have millions either, our will is more about Thomas and what happens to him and the money we’ve put away for him.
    Yup, I have the bum heart and in May DH was diagnosed with Pulmonary Arterial Hypertension – the blood pressure in his pulmonary artery is too high and he has to take meds three times a day to regulate it. Without it, there’s not enough arterial blood going to vital organs like heart and brain . . . So he has a bum major artery ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

    Reply
  7. Cams @HoneyKids

    It’s a tough decision to make. If anything happens to me before Tash is 14 she will go to my mom, however, when she is 14 she and I will discuss her options togethr. I think she’ll be old enough then to have a say.

    Reply
  8. Tourmaline

    We have a broker coming to see us on Thursday night to get our will drawn up and Caleb’s godparents appointed. We also have to start looking at life insurance, it’s stupid to ignore it. Death can happen when you least expect it and then you wonder afterwards (if you’re not the one who died, per se) why you didn’t do it when you thought about it. Good on you!!

    Reply
  9. minkiminki

    At least this is one thing I have sorted out (actually, on an ongoing basis, my chosen guardians keep on dying!). Last Will and Testament in place, Life Insurance policies in place, everything.
    On a funnier note, when interviewing the prospective guardians (yes, I interview them), as soon as they hear “Minki comes with her own money” they agree a lot faster :).

    Reply
    1. rochelle.barrish Post author

      Lol, when I spoke to my sister and I told her Thomas comes with a PVR and lifelong DStv subscription, she was sold!

      Reply

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