Is something human beings struggle to deal with. Exhibit A – the latest school shooting in America (where else?).
I struggle with it. Getting better with age, though. And having a child helps with getting over your issues. A lot. Thomas has taught me so much about myself. He’s turned his introverted mommy into an extrovert. (We’re still working on Daddy). And boy, has he developed my character!
The most recent lesson my son taught me was how to handle rejection. This is how our conversation went.
Me: Hey Beeb, what did you get up to at school today? Any time-outs?
T: Erm, I just played and did some drawings.
M: Ok. How much sand did you bring home this time? (Reference to all the sand I find in his shoes and clothes).
T: Hahaha, enough to build a sandcastle! Oh Mama, I asked a boy from the Blue class (the other Grade R class) if he wanted to play with me and he said no. So I went to look for Nasi (one of his usual mates) and played with him.
Tania blogged about talking to your kids today. I’m not surprised at the number of parents who don’t talk to their kids. I know. You’re tired.They are tired and all you get is “fine” or “ok” if you ask about their day or how school was.
I learnt early on to ask questions that does not lead to fine or ok. But it took me a while to figure it out. And as Tania said, you have to unravel and unravel and unravel- best you have wine. . . until you get the good stuff out of them.
We’ve dealt with bullies, crappy teachers and all sorts in between. And as she mentions in her blog, the trick is not to ever ever show your kid that you’re angry or upset. They need you to be all adult and rational.
Easier said than done. Believe me. I went to threaten Thomas’ one bully with jail! Hahaha. I know. Totes over reacted but fuckit, he’s my son. My only child. I send him to school in perfect nick and I want him back in perfect nick. Not damaged physically, mentally or psychologically.
So as Tania says, speak to them, listen to them and be patient.You will hear what you need to hear and hopefully have enough time to stop any funny business.
I know I’ve said this before, but bloody hell, I take my hat, bra, and even pantaloons off to single moms and those single dads who are hands on. I’m flying solo this week and besides the obvious reasons for missing the captain of my heart and home, there are loads of other things he does that I totally take for granted and when he’s not around, it feels like I’m missing a limb.
All the single moms out there? I cannot believe there is not a Single Mom’s Day. Because feck, you deserve it. I will never ever ever complain again. Because, really, I have no reason whatsoever to complain.
Don’t get me wrong. I can so fly solo, it’s just really difficult to keep all the balls in the air when you’re alone. And having a super husband who just makes everything tick in the background, adds to the dropping of balls when he’s away.
Thomas has gone to school minus the usual things.
We’ve been super late.
We’ve almost missed the carpool.
He’s had Charly’s cake for breakfast.
He’s gone to bed in his clothes. No bath, no brushing of teeth.
And the poor child has even had to bring me my wine.
Big love and respect to all the single mommies. You guys are frigging awesome.
PS: If you’re a single involved dad, take a bow!